World's Cutest Grapes (the cute little green ones, not the big, purple mean ones)

I forced Jeremy to make an "aw, these grapes are so cute" face so I could take this picture.
That's my life.

Ode to Sawgrass

On my recent trip(s) to the USofA I rekindled my love for shopping.
It's all thanks to my parents' new neighbor, Sawgrass Mills Mall.
I got so much sweet stuff for crisis-friendly prices.
Oh, also, before this mall got so huge it used to be shaped like an alligator! Beat that.
Outlet malls rock my socks. Literally.

So-Me X ghersionmyjersey///SWATCHes of the Day

Famous French designer, So-Me, just dropped by our office today rocking his exclusive SWATCH watch.
Feel free to reblog this, HYPEBEAST.
ps-How sweet is my new acquisition?
It's so impractical, I fucking love it.

FYI

I'm going here on Friday:
To watch these peeps get married:
(They don't look super cool in this picture, but they really are.)
So I'll be taking a little break from not blogging.

Rubik's Torment

Today I pulled an old Rubik's cube out of my drawer.
It's a dream of mine to solve it.
It's been a dream for a long time.
I can always get one face, but from there it's hard to figure out the rest.
I never know if I should go for the adjacent or the opposite side next.
I usually end up with one face and 8 pieces of an adjacent one. And a lots of frustration.
I know there's a logical/mathematical explanation but it has yet to click in my brain.
I can wait.

I'm going to Costa Rica on Friday.
I think I'll bring this evil, little cube with me for the bus/plane.
Wish me brain.

Leftover Dysphagia

Doodle from un-used picture of Jayne.

artist: Jeremy Wirth.
ink on printed paper
2009

A 41 sec. Short Story/Swatch of the Day

I was woken up by the sound of Doug eating something. I looked at him. His bone was next to him. I reached into his mouth and pulled out my Swatch. My favorite Swatch. I looked at his face. He looked hurt. I looked at Doug's face. He looked innocent. He wasn't.
I yelled at him in a way that made him slant his face in confusion. I calmed down. I yelled at him again in a way he was familiar with. I did this 4 more times. He knew.
I turned my back towards him and went to sleep. I gave him the cold shoulder until I woke up later. I tapped my hand on the bed three times. He came over and laid down next to me. Doug, not the Swatch. We cuddled for the rest of the morning.

Dysphagia with J and J 101

Jayne was teaching me all about dysphagia which is pretty interesting.

jayner342
14:17
ok so when u swallow your epiglottis which is this flap above the larynx inverts to cover your vocal folds and trachea so you dont choke, well if that flap doesnt work or if the hyoid bone which moves that flap doesnt work then you aspirate which means food either hits your vocal folds or when its real bad goes below your vocal folds and then eventually into your lungs
so then u have food or liquid in your lungs
which causes pneumonia
and hten you die
D
I
E
die

ghersdog
14:18
hahahahaha
oh my lord
gross

jayner342
14:19
haha

ghersdog
14:19
cant u remove the food from there?
jayner342
14:19
no maam

ghersdog
14:19
no way!

jayner342
14:19
but u can take meds i think to help
like it does something down there but thats when the pulminologist steps in and i step out so i have no idea

ghersdog
14:19
but what if like u accdientally swallow while berathing (which has happeend) and u get liek a little green pea in there
does that mean that the rest of ur life u will live it with a little pea in your throat?
jayner342
14:20
ok well usually during the 2nd phase of swallowing u have a period of apnea which is when you stop breathing for a split second to swallow
but if that function is not intact hopefully youve chewed the pea first
and your epiglottis is functioning

ghersdog
14:20
what if i haven't!!!!!!

jayner342
14:20
hahaha
uhhh
i guess you have pea chunks in there
theres no way though

ghersdog
14:20
ok
that's cool though

*This is when I decided to stop working on my radio spot and start making Jayne an arts and crafts project. I had the idea in my head instantly and then Jayne said this.

jayner342
14:21
not if you have a pea floating in your lung
hahaha
i pictured it
in an xray
boucning around

ghersdog
14:21
i knooooow



In order to make this blog more educational, but more secretely just so I can have something to blog about, I think I will start teaching you guys some more stuffs (stuff with an s!) through the art of ichat+arts'ncrafts. Get your pants excited!